Why Is Teen Dating in Decline?

In 1980, 87% of 12th graders had been on a date. By 2014, it was just 58%. Photo: Churaya Islam

By MANUEL LOZANO-VELEZ, CHURAYA ISLAM, and BRANDON BARCLAY 

Is teen dating outdated? Romantic relationships between teenagers has been on the decline in recent years, and while some may see this as a positive development, others argue that it has negative consequences. So why has teen dating gone down, and what are the implications of this trend?

One possibility is that increased pressure from academic activities has greatly reduced the time or motivation for having a romantic partner. It’s also possible that many members of Gen Z are reaching emotional maturity at a later stage than in the past.

“I feel as though boys my age are confused and don’t know exactly what they want or what they want to get into,” said sophomore Valentina Minaya. “They could just end up causing their partner a lot of unnecessary emotional damage.”

In the social media age, are sensitivities or perceived standards getting in the way?

“Females have a list of requirements for a boyfriend that aren’t even realistic,” said senior Abdul Hassan. “Sometimes, they’ll cry for a ‘nice guy’ when they’re single and then go on to talk to toxic men.”

Maybe there’s a societal shift away from steady partnerships that’s beginning.

“I think things like hook-up culture have increased,” said senior Warner Gephardt. “The idea of building a family is viewed less positively than in the past. People want to be single and independent, which I think is bad for society.”

According to research by Jean Twenge and Heejung Park, the percentage of U.S. 12th graders who have ever gone out on a date plummeted from 87% in 1980 to just 58% in 2014. The number of teens who have a driver's license and who work for pay has also fallen dramatically. These are two factors that make teen dating easier.

Many of those interviewed saw the decrease in dating as a positive change.

“I think teen dating isn’t a good idea because people our age are still figuring things out and learning who they are and what they want in life,” said senior Farooq Salam. “They tend to become overly attached, which leads to higher stress levels and heartbreak.”

“I think [teen dating] is kind of silly because it’s a waste of time,” said senior Luca Eaton. “All that time and energy can be spent working on yourself and building a close group of friends.”

However, there are still a few who think the fall in teenage relationships is a mistake.

“I think teens should be dating because you can gain experience and learn some lessons that may be useful in the future,” said senior Chloe Tse.

“You should talk to people and get to know what’s out there,” said Hassan. “Talking to the opposite gender helps a person’s social skills, which can come in handy in the future.” 

Teenagers are now more likely than in the past to meet and form relationships through social media platforms like Instagram, TikTok, and Snapchat, rather than in person. While this can offer a wider pool of potential partners and easier communication, there could be some unwanted side effects.

“I think that social media detrimentally affects relationships today because couples put their entire relationships on the internet in order to seem happy to their peers,” said sophomore Bella- J’adore Dyer. “This causes the couple to lose their sense of individuality as people as they often find themselves feeling empty when they don’t have their partner.” 

“A lot of people see others dating and begin to feel lonely,” said Tse. “I think that teens today want the experience and the memories but they may not actually want the person that they are dating.”

So, is the decline in teen dating good or bad? The answer is not so clear. It may reflect a more mature approach to relationships among young people, who want to take their time and be selective in choosing a partner rather than jump into something. On the other hand, teens who do not have experience with dating may struggle with the social skills and emotional intelligence necessary for forming meaningful relationships later in life.

Currently, this trend shows no sign of reversing. Both researchers and the teenagers themselves need to give more thought to why young people are avoiding romance in high school, and whether this is leading to a healthier society or simply more social and emotional isolation.